:: Life in the Lost Lane ::

Life in the Lost Lane
A collective of English Gentlemen

Friday, June 2

WHITE WINS CASH-BACK AWARD FROM ROTTEN APPLE

An embattled consumer has today won a month long war of words against computer manufacturer Apple. The trendy PC builder accepted that it had failed to deliver on time and that customer service had been poor for Mr White. The angry consumer ordered his laptop in May and is still to receive it.

Mr White, a father of seven living in London's "down and out" Stockwell area said that he was, "alright" about the cash bung. "My kids have been without web porn and movie downloads for too long." He added, "I need this cash for smack, jack, whack and black."

Barry Core, a spokesperson for Apple denied that this was the usual treatment for his customers, though did say he had "serious doubts about giving cash to a hazy-headed-loon like Mr White."

Meanwhile Paul McCartney, who was once signed on "the other Apple" record label waded into the furore: "Linda would be proud of Mr White's consumer campaign. He's the living monument of Linda's work."

posted by E! @ 10:14 AM

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